Well now that graduation has happened, I find myself sitting in my dad’s garage running a 3-day garage sale. Oh the life of a graduate. But like all things, I am able to learn from this dainty sale that we are holding at 467Keeneland Lane. Before this long weekend, I have been challenged to recognize the differences, similarities, strengths, and weaknesses of the 2 weirdest creatures alive: male and female. From leaving a Christian world that is scared of being stereotypically correct in their gender and entering the real world where gender stereotypes are embraced, my perspective of gender communication and relationships has been thrown, tossed, chucked, heaved, anything you could think of really. Another influencing factor that has had more of an impact is that one of my closest friends is a “current lesbian”. I say current, because I am still the friend that believes she will one day be with a man. Her lifestyle has made me question what she finds in a relationship with a woman that would be more appealing than a relationship with a man. (Let me make it clear that I am not trying to figure out which kind of relationship I would rather be in, but rather trying to understand my friend and the reasons for her decisions.)
When I dissect the woman-to-woman relationship, I am forced to recognize the characteristics of females and how they differ from males. It is a very interesting topic in this generation as women gain more and more power in the corporate world, which in turn grants them more influence in the social world as well. So why did I start off this entry referring to a garage sale? Because the women that enter this garage have a distinguishing characteristic that sets them apart from the men. Every lady is shopping for somebody else. Debby’s looking for her niece, Sally is looking for her husband, and always always always they are looking for their children (whether their children are 2 or 32). A characteristic that is hard to come by in this world, can be found in this very garage, and that is selflessness. How ironic that Eve was thinking of only herself when she bit into that apple, because I find that women can be some of the most selfless people on this earth. I have no doubt that my friend appreciates the emotional side of her lesbian relationship, in that women definitely care what “the other person” is thinking or how they are feeling. And even if a man may feel that way, I have found that they have interesting ways of expressing that. The men that come into the garage sale often leave quickly because they know exactly what they are looking for. They do not stray from the table that they came to look at, their intentions are straightforward and logical, like most of their relationships. Because so many of my actions are inspired by my feelings, I have trouble understanding the efficient, unemotional way of a man’s brain. This could be exactly why women and men are good together, but it also could be why there is so much divorce. As our society emphasizes that the “feeling of good” indicates the value of an idea or relationship, women may be led to a wrong conclusion based on their feeling based decisions. I admire men for being able to decipher a good feeling from a right decision.
:)
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